Okay, okay, I know what you're thinking: The hours of labor and pushing, years of diapers, potty training, and temper tantrums didn't make you feel like a mom? Well, the truth is that most of the time I still feel like, well, me! Then there are those moments where my mother will eerily speak through my mouth like a long-distance ventriloquist, or one of my children will do something that they've never done before and suddenly I'm overwhelmed by the realization that I'm not just me, but their mom.
Anyway, a new kid has moved in downstairs. A. is 7 and only slightly taller than Reagan. He's so excited to have met another boy! A. has come over two afternoons in a row. I hear myself saying things like, "You boys can go play, but I need Reagan home in half an hour!" or "Why don't you boys play here for a while." I'm saying things real moms say! How cool is that? Sometimes I wonder if they can tell that I'm totally just feeling my way through this whole motherhood thing.
I had kids in and out of here yesterday. It was so great. It was always my dream to have the house that all the kids wanted to play at. I have always told Dominic that he made all my dreams come true. And he really has.
Dominic has been in California this weekend. I've missed him. I think he deserves a big hug and kiss when he comes home! And I hope I never have to take the kids to church all by myself again. It's a little emberassing when the priest has to compete with your one-year-old during the homily. And I've only got two hands. This age can be a little overwhelming. Thank heaven she sleeps.
I think there's more to sleeping than just replenishing energy reserves. I think sleeping reminds parents that their children are precious. 'Cause sometimes we have BAD days, and if they didn't look so angelic at the end of it, I might trade them in on newer models.
And thinking things like that is one more thing that makes me a real mom. We don't get the good writers like on TV. Sometimes we actually have no idea what we're doing and are surprised that people actually let us raise children. On the other hand, it's that knowledge that we're not perfect that actually, probably makes us good moms in the first place.