I always had ideas about how I wanted to raise my kids. I wanted to bond with them. I wanted to know who they were as human beings and individuals. I believed that coming to know and respect them would lead naturally into good positive discipline. The only problem was that I didn't know how to do that.
Eventually, and thankfully, someone finally pointed me in the direction of Dr. Sears, and I learned about Attachment Parenting. It turned out that those ideas weren't permissiveness as I'd been taught. In fact, it was a simple set of tools that would allow me to form the relationships I'd always wanted with my kids.
Dr. Sears taught me that things like birth bonding, babywearing, co-sleeping, breastfeeding, and all the other "Baby B's" would allow me the time and contact that I needed to really "get behind their eyes" and see the world from the perspective of my kids. Armed with that kind of understanding I know better how to teach them. It's not enough to punish my child for hitting her sister. If I know why she hit her sister, I know how to help her see things differently and make it so she doesn't do it again.
Gentle mothering is not a set of rules and regulations to be adhered to. It is not a legalistic methodology to be followed to the letter. It is a way of approaching parenting that sees children as complete human beings who deserve respect. And it provides the tools lead our children gracefully to adulthood. As I listen to my oldest child speak kindly and gently to his baby brother in the next room, I can see the fruits of this parenting at work. My children are growing up to respect us and each other. And our connection is priceless.