I know what you're thinking, Buck up Buttercup, it's just a damned birthday.
And you're right! It's ridiculous. I'm 36, not 76. And despite the feeling that my life is passing me by so much more quickly than I want it to, I really did have a great birthday. My husband even made me this video:
That's my husband singing.
I got flowers, my family treated me like a Queen. And my bestie had a birthday part for me at her house, where I was surrounded by friends and people who love me.
I'm a work in progress. And, to be honest, I thought by 36 there would be a lot more progress made. But at the same time, I have a roof over my head, food on my table, a family who loves me and friends, too. I have a good life going. Granted, in my next life if I could have all of that and be independently wealthy, that would be lovely. But I'm not complaining, really. I was never someone who aspired to be rich. I always wanted to be happy and loved, and I am.
In thinking about what I've learned at this point in my life, I think my latest lessons have been really good ones. So here they are:
- The best idea I had as a mother was that my children were individual human people, who would come into this world and be separate from me. They would have their own thoughts, feelings, ideas, emotions, hopes, and dreams. If I respect who they are, they will learn to respect who I am. And one day, I might get to be both their mother and their friend.
- When someone pays me a compliment, I should say "thank you". I shouldn't immediately think of why they're wrong, or the hundred ways I can pick myself apart in my head. I should just say thank you. There is a wide range between tearing myself down and becoming a narcissist, apparently. It turns out that acknowledging the things I do right will not take me from one extreme to the other.
Our lives are a gift, and I want to really live mine.